Amanda went to take a shower in the morning. As soon as she left the room, Alyssa and I returned to bed. When she came back, rather than yelling at us to wake up (as would be usual), she jumped back into the bed with me shouting about how there was no hot water. She’d just taken a cold shower. Alyssa decided then that she would not be showering today. We calculated then that she’d not showered in four days, although she insisted it was only two. We ended up proving her wrong. I said that I would shower anyway since I hadn’t the day before and, as previously stated, I am a smelly, smelly man. When I arrived at the restroom, I entered the men’s shower stall, disrobed, and turned only the hot water knob, leaving the cold entirely alone. Yes, the water was cold, but I didn’t think it freezing. It was warm enough for me to contend with long enough to shower. I quickly closed the window in the shower stall, which was letting in plenty of cold air. Roughly the time that I got the shampoo and soap all over me, the shower miraculously heated up. It was still not on par with where I would have liked, but it was much better. I hoped that it wasn’t just that my nerves had been deadened to the cold, but when I opened the shower curtain later, there was steam in the changing area.
There was a book on the nightstand next to the larger bed in the room that looked like a restaurant menu, but with way more pages. Flipping through it, it turned out to be pretty well the guide to Reefton. First it had information on all the historical sites and such the town had to offer, then information on all the hotels (that was sort of surprising, that they’d advertise for their competition like that), and then the complete menus for all the cafés and restaurants. Pretty much nobody had breakfast. One place did. We thought it odd that they served omelets for lunch, but not breakfast. My breakfast vote lay with finding a gas station and getting those excellent meat pies we’d had the previous day. As it turned out, there were no gas stations in Reefton, and all the convenience stores seemed to still be closed at 10:30.
In the next town, we found our gas station, and I found my pie. Hell yes.
We drove to Hanmer Springs, one of two homes of the hot springs. We paid $12 for a day in one of Hanmer Springs’ thermal spas, which was essentially several pools at various temperatures with various elements in them, such as sulfur, which are supposed to be good for your skin. We spent five hours relaxing in the water and doing nothing. It was most excellent.
We decided not to eat in the café at the spa. We were going to, even though it was a little on the pricey side, but as we went up to order we saw a sign saying that they had a "limited menu" between the hours of 4 and 6pm. It was not quite 5:00. We inquired as to what the limited menu was, and they said pretty much chips (fries). We decided to leave. As we were coming up to Lucy the van, we saw a guy sticking something under her windshield wiper. He smiled and nodded at us and walked away. We investigated the note, which we’d seen him stick under a wiper on every car in the lot, and it was an ad for an Asian restaurant called Captain’s Wok (although, on the note, they’d misspelled their own restaurant as "Caption’s Wok") which was just down the street. We decided to eat there. The same guy who left the note took our order. He did not speak English very well. He seemed excited, or happy at least, when I asked to bring chopsticks. There was a large computer monitor set up where they were showing a live performance by Shania Twain. The food was absolutely awesome and with huge portions for a reasonable price, as most Asian places are. We managed to eat and leave before "Man I Feel Like A Woman" came on but unfortunately not soon enough to miss "That Don’t Impress Me Much." I don’t much like Shania Twain. Her lyrics are egotistical. At one point during the show she had some guy come on stage, and he proposed to his girlfriend. Amanda, who’d not been paying much attention (I’m not sure why I was) asked who that guy was. I said, some guy. The conversation progressed somehow to Amanda asking if he was one of her backup dancers. Alyssa and I had a good laugh. Amanda was confused.
We continued on to Kaikoura, where we found a holiday park and got a cabin for the night. We were going to stay in the van again to save money, since none of our electronic devices needed charging (amazingly enough, not even my camera…probably since we spent the day in the hot springs and didn’t really have use for the electronics), but we desperately needed to do laundry. The Laundromat in town was a bit expensivo. The holiday park we ended up at was less so. Yes, I realize that paying more at the Laundromat and saving the cost of lodging for the night would have cost less, but there were other factors involved in the decision that I don’t particularly want to discuss, save to say that we would still have gone the Laundromat route if the Laundromat had restrooms. What the hell kind of Laundromat, or any business, doesn’t have restrooms?! Jerks.
We kind of pulled a fast one on the holiday park and said there were only two people. It’s cheaper that way and I don’t understand why. There’s still three beds in the cabin, but we’re only using two, so what difference does it make? I feel kind of bad about it but only a little. This whole country feels like a ripoff. I coined a new slogan for New Zealand. Here it is: "New Zealand!: We Fuck The Tourists As Hard As We Can!" or, if that’s too long and cumbersome: "NZ: Fuck The Tourists!" or "NZ: It’s Better On TV!"
I’m not overly impressed, if you can’t tell. Amanda and Alyssa are having a better time here, anyway, and I’m still glad I came. I’m not going to have an opportunity like this again, probably. I want to go to Holland.
Over and out. More tomorrow.
No comments:
Post a Comment